To be honest, my bottom doesn't burn that often. When it does, I know I have had a spanking that fits into the top 20% category. Let me explain.
I suppose you could divide my spankings up (approximately) into 50% 'because spankings turn us both on', 10% 'quick, meaningful swats', 20% 'reminder/readjustment/stress relief' - and 20% 'You have been a very naughty girl, and you deserve to be spanked' variety. Yes, he has started to use that exact phrase. Yes, my Dan. The one who used to call it Spanky Panky amongst other things. Sigh.
The spankings that fall into the latter group are not pretty. They involve lots of noise and lots of indignation on my side, and lots of stern commands and stoic resignation on Dan's side.
He never spanks in anger. Not ever. He always thinks, considers and ruminates. Sometimes for too long, far too long, so that I either forget anything has happened, or think he has completely forgotten about it.
Then he acts like a hawk diving on its prey, and I get a whopping to remember! LOL!
Why 'LOL'? Because this was what I asked for in the first place, and what I used to dream of. I used to almost salivate with anticipation, and usually the outcome was more of a damp squib than a spanking to set my butt on fire.
Now a line has been drawn.
I may not cross that line - or I do so at my own peril.
Dan is not a spontaneous person, and I don't think he ever will be. He reads all the small print about ninety times.
However, I can now safely admit that what he says goes, and that if I care to disagree in a less than respectful manner, I will suffer the consequences of any words or actions.
The snag is, and I suppose I have this in common with other dd/ttwd wives, I don't know when to keep my mouth shut and let Dan have the last word. I'm getting better, but I am not there yet.
To watch the battle of wills acted out in this household is as engaging as watching an A-list movie. You would almost want to bring popcorn and blue slush!
A week ago I tried Dan's patience to the limit. It lasted on and off all day. It had to do with the fact that our central heating was turned up, but Dan had refused to light the woodburner as he said it was warm enough. I was not warm. So by evening I was in full "moaning wife" mode. I was stamping around with a pashmina round my shoulders looking very pained.
Then, come evening, I realised there was nothing whatsoever on the TV that I wanted to watch. It was all SO BORING.
Dan was ensconced in his old armchair in the lounge, and I was in the back sitting room determinedly watching Amazon Prime. I watched a film called 'Enough Said' which was slow going, not very good, and I didn't know the actors. I was curled up with a large fluffy throw and in a bad mood.
Part way through the evening Dan appeared, to raid the corner cupboard for a glass of single malt, and he happened to remark how surprised he was that I was in there on my own, when he was enjoying the benefits of a blazing log fire and watching 'Police Interceptors'.
"Well, bully for you." I growled. "I hate Police Interceptors." Then I thought a bit. "Do you mean to tell me that you have been in there with a lovely hot fire while I have been out here freezing to death, and you didn't bother to come and tell me."
Dan smiled evilly at this point. "You told me you were watching a film."
"But only because there was nothing on either Skye or terrestrial worth watching."
I think, at that point, Dan filled his glass, lifted an enquiring eyebrow towards me and the TV set, and left for warmer climes.
Huh! Who does he think he is! He's meant to care for all my bodily comforts! I just sat and seethed.
Eventually I went and got a hot drink and marched off up to bed. It wasn't that warm up there either, in my opinion, but I soon warmed up under the duvet. I huddled down and prepared to sulk. In fact, I was determined to sulk.
I lay there drowsily beginning to feel warm for the first time that day.
Suddenly the door burst open and Dan stalked noisily into the bedroom.
He wrenched my lovely warm duvet away from me and turned me swiftly on my stomach.
"You've been a very naughty girl today, Ami" he informed me. (I was trying to retrieve the duvet.) "I'm completely fed up with your whining and your disrespectful attitude."
Without warning he bent down and gave me a good dozen or so very hard spanks on my bare bottom with his hand, whilst holding me down by the scruff of my neck. (Yes, this is funny. You are allowed to laugh like drains!)
"I want you downstairs keeping me company for a while, and if you don't appear within the next couple of minutes, I will be back." With that he left the room.
My bottom burning, it didn't even take me half that amount of time to get my self and my bottom down those stairs.
The blast of heat that hit me as I walked into the lounge nearly took my breath away. I lingered in front of the fire and lifted my robe and seared the remaining bits of my bottom that had escaped his hand. It was so soothing. Give me heat over cold any day. I stretched myself out on the sofa and luxuriated for the next couple of hours.
The next morning I did feel much better.
My mood had lightened considerably and I happily went downstairs and made us both a drink and took them back to bed.
When I entered the bedroom I nearly dropped the tray. Dan was propped up on the headboard in our 'spanking position', paddle in hand. (Have you ever noticed how your bottom literally clenches when confronted by such a scene?)
"Spanked? That was only a quick 'Do you realise how much you are trying my patience?' spanking. This morning we need to get things sorted. Come here."
It is very hard to come here when confronted with the Big Nipper. It is totally loathsome. My feet genuinely stick to the floor.
"Do you have to use that?" (Wrong thing to comment on.)
"Get over my lap and stop trying to control the situation."
Dan's look was enough. I draped myself accordingly and prepared to grit my teeth. There was no warmup, just a series of hard, fast swats all to one side.
"You're spanking all on the same spot." I yowled.
"Am I really? Then I'll change sides."
He then went on to spank exactly the same spot but on the other cheek. Then he started his 'skin-stretching' technique which he knows I hate more than anything.
Pretty soon I was at the stage where I try to stretch out my legs in the hope that tightening the muscles will deflect the pain. It never works, in fact it makes it worse. Then I try to relax totally. But how can you relax when the skin is being burned off your ass with a thin, snippy, wooden paddle with holes in it?! All these books you read about being spanked, where the woman suddenly relaxes and gives in, are utter bosh! The last thing I want to do is relax and give in! So I kick ferociously for a minute or two. Then Dan's hand comes down hard on the back of my left thigh and he tells me in no uncertain way to lie still and keep the noise down.
"You'd think you were being murdered", he said. "Do you think I don't know just how to spank you after all this time."
My mind is running for the hills, and I, like many other women here, can only wonder how long this is going on for, and whether or not I will make it to the end.
Tears come. I press my face into the bedding and howl for all I am worth.
And miraculously, amazingly, the fight and animosity and stress leave me immediately. I feel them seep away leaving me gloopy and relaxed despite the continuing spanking.
Once I cry, the spanking never continues for long. Dan continues to hold me over his knees while I have a good wail. He even hands me a Kleenex, and I blow my nose lustily.
He strokes my back and my bottom. It feels heavenly. He pulls me up and I snuggle into his chest and relax even more, if that can be possible.
He teases my nipples, and then further acts of submission are requested, and I am happy to comply.
As time goes on and the harder the spankings, the better the love making, and the more powerful the orgasms. And the more determined Dan is to ensure they keep coming. TTWD is a very strange thing.
There is something very satisfying about making love when you have a burning bottom!