How Compliant are You?

Notice I didn't use the word submissive? 

But I suppose that's what I really mean. I've thought about it a lot over this past week. More than a week in fact.

Somehow over the past couple of weeks our feet don't seem to have touched the ground. We have been racing around from one place to another, or had the house full of people. 

It's been a couple of weeks when I began to think at one point that Dan was fed up with my company, because he was never around. Or didn't seem to be. 

He is very involved with helping to organise a fund-raising cycle ride in June in aid of prostate cancer; plus his voluntary work visiting the homes of the elderly and vulnerable, fitting smoke alarms and carbon monoxide detectors; plus going to support our home team (football - that's soccer to some of you) who have had an unpredictable season; plus he's even been away working for one or two days which have necessitated overnight stays.

There has been no time to even think about spanking. It has just been too full on. A typical example of life getting in the way. Maybe some people can manage to squeeze it in here and there, but with Dan, it seems a major impossibility, and always ends up getting deferred indefinitely. It seems he has to be in the mood for it.

As I mentioned in a previous post, I no longer ask for spankings, nor do I purposely sulk and sigh and flounce about trying to provoke a fight. I just stay hopeful; and mostly that eventually seems to work.

But I have noticed Dan can be very cunning. His 'don't you dare do that'/'not another word'/'don't even think it' signals are getting more practised. In times of spanking scarcity, these signals are definitely more prolific.

The strange thing is that, on the whole, I seem to acknowledge them, and they do tend to halt me in my tracks.

So, is this submissive? Surely it's just common sense?

Now - I know that many of you own up to the fact that you didn't promise to "obey" when you got married. Why is this?

It's something I've thought about time and again over the years - nearly 38 now.

I didn't want to say those words. After all, the Princess Royal had just got married, and she didn't say them! So why should I?

Well, I promised to obey because our priest refused to marry us otherwise, and because Dan gave me a very black look, which said "Obey or else". I can remember it clear as day.

"Why should I?" I asked the both of them. (I was feeling very heated and press-ganged at the time.)

"Because," the priest explained, "he will literally give his life for you should it be necessary. He will be there by your side to protect you from anything and everything the world and the years to come, throw at you. He will love you and guide you and lead you, all the years of your lives."

I can remember Dan nodding in puzzled agreement, but thinking it strange that the priest should be putting him on a silver steed, fitting him with shining armour and handing him a lance. It made him feel like a dog with two tails because it appealed to his natural sense of maleness. 

So I stood there in front of the congregation and spoke those words "I obey" in spite of not really thinking about what I had actually agreed to, and looking back, I find it quite amazing that such a feisty, argumentative little so and so such as me, would acquiesce in such a way. (I did throw the occasional saucepan at Dan's head those first few years, but that's another story!).

To start with we both worked full time, then when the children came along I continued to work part time. We always had our specific tasks in our household, that we kept to. 

Dan sorted the finances, kept the septic tank from blocking up, mowed lawns and kept the outside in good order. He looked after the cars in all aspects from fuel to insurance. He was brilliant at paddock maintenance. (He still does all these things!)

I looked after the inside and all that entailed, from cooking and laundry to interior design, decorating and being a mother with all that entailed. (I still do all these things, but being a mother is somewhat different in this day and age, and I've added being a grandmother to the list long since.)

Dan would be away for long periods at a time, sometimes flying back from one destination to be gone to another within 24 hours. I had horses, dogs, cats, hens and boisterous children. And a part time teaching job. I was busy to the point of exhaustion. But somehow the years flew.

I got used to Dan drawing up a daily list of things for me to do. I got used to him asking or phoning me and ask me to do little extras such as banking or picking up his dry cleaning. I never questioned when he would invite business colleagues for dinner, or meetings in his office. 

I just got on with it all.

Strangely, it wasn't until our children were in their late teens, and beginning to fly the nest, such as away at college, that things started to go a little awry for us. 

I am a strong, independent woman. I believe in strong independent women. Our ancestors fought for it. They chained themselves to railings to achieve it, went on rallies and carried placards. 

I salute them for it. I wouldn't have it any other way. One of my heroines is Elizabeth Garratt Anderson, who not only had a family, but who became one of the very first female doctors - and managed to find time to march as a suffragette! (We have a whole hospital wing named after her.)

But somehow, along the way, something got lost.

In our fight for female suffrage, we forgot to lean on the ones we love the most. Instead of seeking their strength and assistance, we fought them, we derided them, we sneered at them. No door opening for us. No helping us on with our coats, or into our cars. If what we wanted was equality, then we could have it. But we couldn't have it both ways. 

So now, when we lust after these strong-minded men ("a white knight on a fiery steed" - listen to the old record by Bonny Tyler!) they are in very short supply. We have driven them back into the woodwork. We have shoved them away and shouted that we can manage very well without them, thank you very much.

Perhaps we can.

But do we really want to?

Dan brought me coffee in bed on Saturday morning and we sat in peaceful contemplation of the sunshine through the windows.

"The first thing I am going to do this morning is to give you a good whacking" he informed me.

To anyone reading this and not understanding Dan, it must sound awful. I have to tell you that Dan is the very last person on this earth who would give me a good whacking. It is not in his nature. A good spanking yes, but not a good whacking. Even when I annoy him above all endurance, his spanking is very controlled - ouchy, but controlled. 

Is this where I should be communicating to him? I thought to myself. Is this where I should be trying to explain that I have felt somewhat neglected this past couple of weeks? That I have felt he was too busy to be interested in me or what I was doing? That I had almost decided to keep a note of just how much he was out gallivanting around with all his 'stuff' while I was mostly at home 'alone'.

I decided not to say anything about it. Why try to provoke an argument? But it smarted. Almost as much as I knew my bottom was about to smart.

"Go get an implement".

How many times have you read that little command on this blog?

I would be interested to know how many of you are sent to fetch the implement shortly to be employed in reddening your rear end? If, like me, you are, do you consider this being submissive - obedient?

And when you are facing that drawer where they are kept, which implement do you choose? How do you make your decision?

Those of you whose husbands get the implement - how would you feel if you were sent to fetch it? 

I can tell you that many thoughts go through my mind at such a time. I would often like to refuse. But this is what I signed up for, isn't it, in the first place? I agreed to obey? Surely that means obey most things? And if spanking is consensual, as it is in this household, surely there should be no argument over me being asked to go get an implement?

But it is very hard to choose which implement is to be used. 

Especially as I rarely know what type of spanking it is going to be. I have known light hearted spankings turn into yelpy battles with Dan bringing me to tears. I have known spankings that start as the type you think are going to be unendurable, turn into the very best of sexy interludes. 

As I may not ask what type of spanking Dan intends,(he tells me it is up to him!)it becomes very difficult to choose the right implement for the occasion. Therefore I usually chicken out and fetch the Rose paddle. At least it is leather and flexible. (Ha! Silly me! I live with permanent crescent shapes decorating my sit-upon.) 

Sometimes I will feel able to pick another implement, when, for example, I know I have been snippy and full of attitude and have stirred up disharmony. On some occasions Dan will send me back for another implement so he can use more than one. 

I don't always like it, but he says that the end always justifies the means. (A means to an end? Ha!)

So I was thoroughly spanked. And it did hurt. My distancing had been noticed. The paddle did the commenting.

As I lay over his knee I asked why it was always me who had to fetch the implement and was told he thought it was good for me in order to be reminded of my place in the hierarchy. (I have a tendency to forget, it seems.) I would dispute that when I look around at some of our vanilla friends.

Dan also likes to be sure that the implement is going to fit the crime. 

He just loves using either of the nippers - big or small. That big one stays hidden well away. I would only ever bring it out if requested to do so. I even rub my bottom in anticipation before the little nipper is used. (How any of you can cope with cheeseboards or wooden paddles I have no idea.)

But back to the subject of being compliant.

Cards on table.

What do you do that you consider is compliance? And I don't mean taking your man a well-earned cup of tea, or massaging his back in the shower, or taking the rubbish bins out - I mean what do you do in order to obey? 

How submissive are you?
Would you agree to "obey" if you went back in time and had to say your vows all over again?
Could you choose your own implement for each spanking, knowing that you might be asked to bring out a much worse one if you chose wrongly?

Finally, what do you consider the difference to be between being compliant, and having a man exert control over you that you found unacceptable?

Just for the record, I would definitely say "I obey" again if I had my time over. Whether I would have behaved any differently without it, I don't know. Whether I would behave any differently way back in time when it was acceptable to spank your wife, I don't know that either. But I really look forward to your opinions, if you have time to give them.

I will finish on a silly note. Dan and I often share the bathroom, although sadly our shower is rather too small for two people of our age and stiff joints. LOL! 

As I bent down to dry my legs he stroked my bottom, consideringly. I thought he might be tempted with a few well placed spanks, but no. 

"Your skin is so smooth these days." More stroking. "It is so silky. Do you rub moisturising cream on it?" 

He was asking me this in all seriousness.

Honestly! Men! 

A Real Neat Blog

Thank you to both Sunny from Aimless Ramblings, and Jan from Dancin' With Roses, for nominating me for this award, although I am quite certain that you know everything about me by now. LOL!

It seems I have two lots of questions to answer, so here goes. The first set are from Sunny:

1  What is your favourite time of day, and why?

I love the early mornings in summer, when the sun is shining. I often get up quietly, without waking Dan, and wander round the garden in my robe, with a pair of secateurs, snipping dead heads of plants, and just breathing in the fresh air. Everything sparkles and the world is fresh and new. 

2  Name the last 3 books you read.

Written in My Own Heart's Blood by Diana Gabaldon, which is the last book in the Outlander series.

The Girl on the Train by Paula Hawkins - unusual and scary.

The Giver Quartet by Lois Lowry - thought-provoking.

3  What's your favourite movie?

The Good Year, starring Russell Crowe

4  If cost were not a factor, where in the world would you most like to visit?

La Pirogue - a very small island in the Seychelles.

5  Milk chocolate or dark chocolate?

The darker the better.

6  Are you a breakfast eater, and if so, what's your favourite breakfast?

Yes, I am a breakfast eater. Often when in a hurry I'll just have peanut butter on toast, but Dan and I love grilled bacon and fried tomatoes. Plus tea for him and a large latte for me.

7  What do you want for your next birthday?

A weekend in London with dinner at the Shard one evening, and another going to see The Mouse Trap. I have never managed to see it yet.

But truly, I am happy as I am now that Dan is cancer free.

The second set are from Jan:

1  Is there anything in real life you wish you could have done but don't think you ever will?

Not really, apart from study more when I was doing my final school exams. However, the good time I had more than made up for it! I am very thankful for my life. I couldn't imagine being anyone else or doing anything differently.

2  Have you ever wanted to tell someone about your TTWD/DD life, been really tempted?

All our friends know I write erotic fiction, but they don't know about TTWD/DD. I can only think of a couple who would understand, and even that might be pushing it a bit. After all, it took me months to get my head around it, and I had already started to initiate a more exciting sex life with my husband after being a "wet hen" for most of my life. I think the idea of being "spanked" would be a step too far for the majority of my very vanilla friends. So although I am sometimes tempted, it is not something I would really contemplate.

3  What is your favourite recipe, the one that tempts everyone?

We all adore Cottage Pie. (That's the one made with beef mince. Ground beef. Not so much Shepherd's Pie, which is the one made with lamb mince.) It is something I make on a regular basis during the winter months, and there is never any left over, regardless of how big the dish is!

4  Name 3 of your favourite "spanking books".

It goes without saying that I love all books by Leigh and PK. I couldn't pick a favourite as I adore Leigh's sexy cowboys, and I adore Cassie and am so grateful to Minelle for bringing her to my attention way back when I first came to Blogland. My other favourite writer is April Hill. She writes with such humour and nonchalance. But again, I couldn't pick a favourite.

5  Are you a dress or jeans girl?

We live in the country on an ex-farm. I spent most of my life around horses and dogs. Because I had to dress in smart clothes, ie suits, for work, I would always come home and put on jeans or jodhpurs the minute I got home. I still wear jeans every day, but I also love wearing long floaty skirts when out, especially in warm weather. I am far too old for short skirts, and somehow longer skirts are so elegant. 

I have trouble getting the size right with dresses as my top half is a bigger size than my bottom half. So if it fits my boobs, it looks like a sack lower down, and if it fits my hips, my boobs are squashed to death.

6  Can you think of one thing you wish someone had told you when you were 18? Are you brave enough to tell an 18 year old you know, that same thing?

Exactly what I wrote earlier. To study more as it would have meant less work and studying later on. Before I retired I used to tell my 16-18 year olds to study their socks off before exams. And mostly they did, apparently, because they mostly got excellent grades.

7  Do you forgive me for nominating you for this Award?

Of course I do! But you wait - I have a long memory. LOL!

The rules that come along with these things are as follows:

1  Put the Award logo on your post.

2  Answer the 7 questions asked by the person who nominated you.

3  Nominate any number of bloggers you like, linking them to their blogs.

4  Let them know you nominated them.

The bloggers I would like to nominate for this Award are as follows:

Megan

Meredith

Katie

Christina

These are my 7 questions to you:

1  What is your favourite season of the year, and why?

2  Your house is on fire. All humans and pets are safely outside. What is the single item you have saved from destruction?

3  If money were no object and you could have any car you wanted, what would you buy?

4  Does your hair colour go with your character? Or would you secretly desire a change?

5  What are your three favourite songs?

6  If you were a bird, which would you be and why?

7  Do you have a collection of anything, and what is it?

Good luck!

Easter Snippets

First of all, I want to wish everyone who is reading here, and some who aren't, a Very Happy Easter. I hope you have a marvellous weekend with family, friends and neighbours. 

Hopefully you will get lots of eggs! I expect the Easter Bunny will be rushed off her feet! Or his feet - I've never personally run into the Easter Bunny, but I did watch the very funny episode of The Vicar of Dibley a few years ago.

Here, in England, Easter weather is very unpredictable, especially as the celebration may fall anywhere between late March and he end of April. We have a saying "Ne'er cast a clout till the May is out."
This is May:

Personally I haven't cast many 'clouts' at all so far.

But whether nor-easterly gales howl, clouds scud or snow flurries, or there is a balmy breeze and pale sunshine, whether the trees are still gaunt and winter-bare, or in the first flush of spring leaf, there are certain dishes which will always be eaten with pleasure. 

Good Friday may no longer be a fast day, as ordained by the Church, but for many it remains a day for quiet reflection and self-restraint, and a plain supper based upon fresh fish is popular.

In Scandinavia, a traditional accompaniment to the Good Friday main course is Janssen's Temptation:

3 large onions
2 lbs waxy potatoes
2 tins anchovies
Half a pint of single cream, or cream mixed with the top of the milk
3 oz butter

You peel and thinly slice the onions and cut the potatoes into strips like matchsticks.

Then you grease a shallow oven dish. Arrange a layer of potatoes, criss-cross with a lattice of anchovies, arrange the onions, finish with another layer of potatoes. Pour over half the cream, then the anchovy oil and dot with butter. Season with black pepper.

Bake in a very hot oven for an hour, or until the potatoes are browning. Pour over the remaining cream. Cook a further thirty minutes or so.

Easter Biscuits:

8 oz plain flour
Pinch of salt
Half a teaspoon cinnamon
4 oz butter
3 oz caster sugar
3 oz currants
1 beaten egg
A little milk
1 oz candied peel, chopped

Sift flour, salt and cinnamon. Rub in butter. Stir in sugar, currants and peel. Form into a stiff dough with the egg, and some milk if necessary. Chill the dough for at least one hour.

Roll out thinly. Cut into rounds. Bake on a baking sheet, at 200C/400F/Gas mark 6 (you may need to lower the temperature if you have a fan over), until the biscuits are a pale gold. This is usually about fifteen minutes. Cool on a tray. Brush with milk, sprinkle with sugar.

Did you know that an old folk lore is that bread baked on Good Friday will keep for seven years, and a loaf of it hung in the barn will keep the rats and mice away? Never tried it myself, but thought you might be interested. We have been simply plagued with rats, mice and a stoat, all winter!

As usual, I am expecting the family over for lunch, but on Easter Monday this year, instead of Sunday. As some of you know, I have been completely immersed in reading the Outlander books. (And would you believe it? My wretched daughter has beaten me to 'streaming' the first five episodes of Outlander on her SMART TV. Poor Dan has been forced into going out and getting hold of a similar TV for us, or live with me marching up and down and howling like a banshee!

However, I am digressing. Thinking about food (well, doesn't everyone?) I was looking in my Jane Austen cookbook with interest to find out what they ate in the second half of the 18th century. I thought you might be interested to know what a "course" of food consisted of back then.

As far as our Georgian ancestors were concerned, as soon as they walked into the dining room they saw before them a table already covered with separate dishes of every kind of food - soup, fish, meat, game, poultry, pies, vegetables, sauces, pickles, sweet and savoury puddings, custards and jellies - in number anything from 5 to 25 items, depending upon the grandeur of the occasion, and arranged symmetrically around the centre dish; this spread constituted a course which was only a part of the dinner! No wonder they called them "removes". You would've had to remove me by force; I think so much food would've paralysed me. No wonder they all suffered from things like gout.

I was reading what the local vicar, a Revd James Woodforde from Norfolk, ate for his Easter dinner. See what you think:

"A calf's head, boiled fowl and tongue, a saddle of mutton rosted on the side table, and a fine swan rosted with currant jelly sauce for the first course. The second course was a couple of wild fowl called Dun Fowls, larks, blamange, tarts, etc, and a good dessert of fruit after, amongst which was a damson cheese." The good Revd said "I never eat a bit of a swan before, and I think it good eating with sweet sauce. The swan was killed three weeks before it was eat and yet not the lest bad taste in it."

Thank goodness we don't eat swan these days!

Life in the Starsong household has been pretty much normal of late. I have hidden the Big Nipper in the bottom of my underwear drawer. (Dan rarely ventures there!) But I did receive rather more than a reminder spanking the other day.

It was one of those occasions when I thought perhaps spankings were a thing of the past. Whilst most of you seem to get regular attention paid to your 'situpons', Dan is pretty hopeless that way, and I have long since given up issuing him with reminders, or asking for spankings. 

So it came as rather a surprise to me the other morning to be suddenly upended over the side of the bed and thoroughly spanked.

Although very occasionally I lean over the wooden footboard once it has been padded with the duvet, mostly I am an over the lap type of girl. It is comfortable, it is a bit silly, Dan likes to lean back against the headboard, and frankly, it leads to other things. Lots of other things. Smug look here.

But this last few days I have been sporting some rather exotic looking horseshoe shaped marks all over my bottom and thighs. And one or two other places too. (Dan did warn me to keep still. He might as well have asked me to fly to the moon!).

Did I ever tell you that as much as I love the Rose paddle, it can be a bitch?! Especially when Dan chooses to swipe with it, and especially when he is not amused, chooses to force my legs apart and stand between them, and chooses to spank all up and down my thighs, my sit spots and even one or two places where I would rather not be spanked at all. 

To begin with I thought it was funny, but I soon changed my mind. I am positive the power of having that paddle in his hand goes to his head at times. I kept telling him not to spank so high. Then I kept telling him not to spank my hips. Then when we had finished with that little argument (he never seems to aim where he should be aiming!) he spanked as far down as my knees before returning and going back up the same way. 

I can honestly say that I have never been spanked quite like it. I really don't know where he got the idea from! 

"Oh, it's a nice colour of red" he joked. (I was busy burying my face in the duvet and making strangled noises.) "Let's see if we can make it a bit redder shall we?"

He kept muttering all those "cliche" sort of things like "I haven't finished yet", "Keep still", "Stop crawling forwards", "I seem to have missed a bit", "You will NOT tell me what to do", "Next time you mention inconsistency perhaps you'll remember this." 

When he finally let me up he decided he wanted to be all frisky. Ha! You could've toasted bread on my poor bottom! Personally I felt glad to survive. I was extremely glad to sit on a cushion at our kitchen table. I didn't dare moan and wriggle around in case he suddenly decided an encore was required.

Funny. You read about times like these and never think it will happen to you. Believe me when I say I have never been so glad in my life that the first implement he came to was the Rose paddle. I don't think I would have worn knickers or jeans for a week if it had been something made of wood! 

But I have to admit that as much as I hate to be spanked hard, it does something to my brain and turns me into a much happier, more content person. It must release some magical endorphins that have the "rose tinted spectacles" effect. Immediately after a spanking like that, and the excellent sex that follows, I am the model submissive wife. Now who would have thought it?!

Before I finish, this is a REAL road sign not too far from us. Can anyone beat it? LOL!

Till next time, lots of hugs!

Booby Traps!

This post doesn't have the slightest thing to do with spanking, but the clue is in the title.

I was reading Sarah's post (Clear as Mud) that she wrote whilst I was away on holiday. It got me thinking.

Ladies - what do you wear to keep your cherished possessions looking perky?

I am a bit of a bra collector myself. I dare not tell anybody the real number of knickers I possess, but I can reveal that my bra collection isn't far short of it. The snag is that as soon as I discover a beautiful, sexy and comfortable bra, they discontinue the line! 

It has got to the stage where if I find a bra that ticks all the boxes, I immediately rush out and buy several in different materials/colours while they are still available. It is so bad that I often have to sneak them into the house. Dan seems to think I can exist with just three: one to wear, one spare and one in the wash. Ha! What do men know?!

I am neither large nor small. My size must, however, be quite popular because I can rarely find a bra I like that fits me. They all seem to be snapped up like freshly baked cakes!

Just so you know (I am not at all shy) my size is 38C cup. I was once lulled into one of those Parisian-style lingerie shops that measure you and then sell you their most expensive item; they tried to tell me I was a 38DD - ha!!! It was so uncomfortable, and far too large. My boobs just slopped around and the thing nearly ended up under my left ear! I've never been back.

I always wear bras with bones. This is sometimes embarrassing going through airports as I am always searched, and the person doing the searching feels up my boobs and looks at me accusingly. One of these days I am going to strangle them with my bra!

I need the bones otherwise my boobs end up under my armpits. Why I should have boobs that desire to go off in opposing directions, I don't know. But there it is. Dan says that when I am putting on my bra I look as if I am trying to herd up cattle! Humph!

I also have, what Dan refers to, as Continental Nipples. 

You can use your imagination here, and they swell when I am cold, to the size of Chapel hat pegs (as we say in England). 

This means that if I wear anything even vaguely see-through, it is at my peril. 

This brings to mind a very memorable occasion when I was much younger. I forgot to put on a bra, went out shopping in our local town, and arrived home having stopped by to visit with a friend on the way. 

Dan took one look at me when he saw me and nearly had a fit. I wondered what he was getting so wound up about until he forcibly stood me in front of our bedroom mirror. My goodness.

The dress was close fitting pale lawn cotton, and practically see through. I was wearing a half-slip so nothing showed from the waist down, but from the waist up it was a different story completely. It took me several years to ask my friend why she hadn't said anything. She simply said she hadn't liked to as she knew I was just returning from town and she didn't know how to broach the subject.

I love comfortable bras more than anything. These vest-like garments with shelves are just plain awful. The shelves always move upwards and cut me in half the wrong way. I think men must've invented them.

I love satin bras, and also silk. I love pure cotton bras when it is hot. I love lacy bras, and bras with pretty straps that you can flaunt. I even have a bra that describes itself "like wearing a duvet". 

It has a padded sort of ledge that my boobs can nestle into!

I have bras for just about every occasion. 

Full bras, half bras, balcony bras, strapless bras, even a sexy Spanx-type garment (in black with gold lace sides) and with a very challenging (to get into) top half that you can wear both with or without straps.

I very rarely wear bras that match my knickers. I tend to pick out a colour in the knickers, and match the bra to the colour. After all, I sometimes wear, for example, a red top with a red bra underneath, and a white skirt with white or flesh-coloured knickers. 

About once a year I have to "de-clutter" my lingerie drawer. 

It nearly kills me. I have to recline with a very stiff gin after it! 

It is not something one can seek help with. Sigh.

By the way, did you know that over here we have certain charities that send "used bras in good condition" to Africa. 

I think at times that half the female population over there must be wearing my cast-off brassieres! But better than consigning them to the bin. I much prefer the thought that someone, somewhere is enjoying my Ted Bakers, La Perlas, Floozies, Triumphs and even my good old everyday Marks and Spencers!

Just imagine what it must have been like in the days before bras! 

"Cinch me into my stays would you, darling?!"

March = Question Time

The days are warming up, March is here, and Easter is only a few weeks away. What happens to time? It seems only a week or so ago it was Christmas?

March = Question Time here in Blogland.

It means that you all have the opportunity to ask me questions, either vanilla or pertaining to TTWD. I will try my best to answer them honestly. 

I always do my best to comment on posts I read, and in turn to answer comments on my posts. Sometimes it is difficult to do this immediately as life gets in the way, but I remember how thrilled I was to get comments when I first started to post, and how avidly I looked to see whether anyone had answered my comments on their posts. It helped me to get to know the people, and many of them are now firm friends.

You can direct your questions to either me or Dan, and I will try to ensure his answers are sensible ones. Please be aware that we are a couple with a great sense of humour, but we will also be happy to offer an opinion or point of view, if you so wish.

Serenity, Peace and Harmony

Spring is on its way. The signs are everywhere. We have some beautiful snowdrops and tiny pink cyclamen under the trees in our garden.

We got back from our vacation last Monday after a good flight with the jet stream behind us. A whole hour early. It made a big difference as I am not one to be able to sleep on an aeroplane, and I get very wriggly after just a few hours.

We have returned to "March coming in like a lion".

"March brings breezes loud and shrill to stir the dancing daffodil".

The daffodils are not out yet and the breezes are more like miniature hurricanes! Watching the birds being blown across the sky is quite amusing.

Just a couple of days before we went on holiday we had some excellent news. Dan had the results of his MRI scan and was informed that he is completely clear of cancer following his High Frequency Ultrasound treatment last March. He will still need bi-annual blood tests and a yearly MRI scan, but we are happy with that. 

I just want to thank all of your who sent us prayers and support during the last couple of years. It is proof that the power of prayer is an amazing force. 

The stress just lifted from his shoulders, and also from mine. It was the best news ever and we were able to go away and really feel justified in enjoying ourselves. Talk about a 'Happy Dance'!

The morning before we were due to travel down to the airport, Dan pulled me over his lap for a "reminder and reinforcement" spanking. He could see that I was beginning to "bubble up" and his plan was to settle me and calm me down, as he knew it would be nigh impossible for any spanking to take place whilst away due to the thin walls between cabins on our cruise ship. Even love-making can be a challenge as I have a tendency for being noisy and energetic. Oh well.

Dan used two implements, our beloved Rose paddle and my hated little nipper. It was quite a hard spanking and when I happily thought it was finished a couple of times, it resumed even harder. 

I had a jolly good cry, and then to quote Katie "Some mighty fine loving followed."

It must seem strange to read how a spanking like this can result in such close and loving feelings towards each other, and how much it lifted my mood and helped me to remain calm whilst packing and travelling to our destination. But I can heartily recommend it.

Not only was I calm for the journey, but I remained calm and in a good frame of mind for our entire holiday. Only once did Dan need to raise his eyebrows and give me one "Settle down - now!" spank, and I quietened and became my usual self. Really I cannot remember such a peaceful and enjoyable holiday.

We did, however, have a funny "instance" whilst in a market in St Lucia. 

It was a wonderful place with fruit and vegetables lined up with toothpaste, cooking oil, handmade goods and clothing. A real eclectic mix.

I was happily looking at some beautifully made wooden salad servers and bowls, quite innocently, when Dan held something up to show me. 

I looked happily at him and giggled, not quite comprehending at first. 

"I should think this will hurt" he said to me conversationally, and went on to discuss aerodynamics. 

The stallholder looked at Dan knowingly and I almost died of embarrassment.

It is a slightly bigger edition of our Little Nipper, but rounded and it has "holes".

Despite my embarrassment a purchase was made. 

So this is our new implement:

It is made out of avocado wood and is highly polished. It is no thicker than the Little Nipper but Dan is quite correct - it has, shall we say, certain aerodynamic properties. LOL! Not!!

By the time we arrived home I had forgotten all about it. It had been packed in Dan's suitcase, so when I unpacked my clothes I didn't give it a thought.

No so Dan.

Having had my lovely "in bed" cup of coffee, on our very first morning back, Dan sat up in bed, rather meaningfully, and said "Right, time to get back to normal."

And he brandished what will be henceforth known as "The Big Nipper" at me. (He had detoured whilst getting the coffee and then concealed it craftily under his pillows.)

I went over his lap, not at all reluctantly. I know better now.

"Wow, this thing really works" Dan informed me.

"You don't need to tell me that" I looked sideways, trying to crane my neck in order to watch the action. I didn't really need to watch - I could feel!

"It gets you red ever so quickly" he added.

"Well thank you for that".

The happy compliance and giggles didn't last for long. This implement does everything it is fabled to do, and more. I found it quite difficult not to kick.

"I am told that it is best to relax and give in to it" I remarked to Dan. "But owww!! how I am meant to do that I just don't know!"

Luckily Dan heard me beginning to squeak a bit, and giving me "one for the road" he stopped. My eyes were just at the pre-brimming over point. My bottom felt glowing all over. Dan had really enjoyed himself.

He gave me the usual evil grin. "That should keep you compliant for a bit."

So, dear friends, I have decided that this is one implement which is not going to see the light of day except when the moon is blue. 

If it hurts as much as this with just smallish wrist flicks, how would it be if Dan felt I had overstepped the line? It is something I am not at all willing to find out.

We have grown a lot, Dan and I in this new life of ours, and long may the serenity, peace and harmony continue.

PS - I am always willing to direct other enterprising husbands to the little stall where the Big Nipper was purchased!